She hates love.

Im truly tired & sick of trying.
& i dont wanna be the fool again.
Now im not even sure hongkong can make me feel better.

Sunday, December 25

Countdown @ orchard was so not fun. Or at least not as fun as i thought. & it sucks that people are playing the foam war everywhere. Hahaha. But i guess its X'mas joy.

Hanging out at east coast was cool, then i made my way to orchard & reached around 11.30. I got a box of ferrero from zhu & willy wonka choc from guoxin. Haha. & Karl gave me a shower gel packed with bear. so sweet.

Im waiting for my hair to dry which is like taking ages. I cant believe its x'mas! Okayes, im mad. I dont wanna sleep.

Saturday, December 24

SO there peeps, Merry X'mas Eve.

I think i had such an unexpected year, the happy times were really the HAPPIEST. and u know what, '07 contributed much much to all this happiness. But the sad times were definitely depressing. But still, I know I have great mates by my side & they rock my life. This is just an understatement. 'Cos I meet nice people now in poly & i dint expect us to bond like this. Its heart warming, totally.

Am supposed to meet karl & some others at 4, but im still blogging and un-bathed. I wish I have more time. I guess pics gotta wait till the next post.

IM LOVING CHRISTMAS.

Friday, December 23

Dear Diary,

I had lotsa fun today! & i really loveLOVE my classmates, they are like so sweet! Im so touched. So we had our x'mas dinner at n.y.d.c heeren. We kinda bombarded the place with our laughters & craps & chit chats.

I love the presents my mates got me. I got a box of seashell-shaped choco, a pink bottle all by binghan, heart chocolates from eileen (really beautiful), heart cushy with my name in glitter (by yongqi, the sweet) & a precious moments box from yingling. I love it babe. Thanks all of u peeps, for adding joy in my life. And not to forget the handmade pic of me and joanne that she made into a postcard (huggs her) and x'mas cards from my darlings. Yunyun got the whole class candies, & i got them lolly(s) from candy empire - really cute. <3>

I wanna go to The Balcony, seems like a really nice place. But we went to Spinelli instead. Argh, im tired & cramps dont make it any better. But at least im a happy girl right now. I cant believe Christmas in in two days time! I love Christmas, its such a festive festival.

LOVE,
san the santarina

Monday, December 19

The dreams go on and on and on.

just like the carousel goes round and round.

the music plays on and on.

Oh dear, im still a child at heart.

Sunday, December 18

Seriously, I dint know 2 wonka hats are wicked enough to make my fever come back. Now, my heads throbbing and I feel hot. What the hell.

I forgot his email & number today. Ta-dah. Quite easily done, not considering the fact that the email popped into my head minutes after I forgot it. I guess it all takes time, all takes time. I've decided that my favourite snack currently is the sugar doughnuts frm St Leaven. I feel happy eating it. :)

You kept me guessin'
And now I'm destined
To spend my time missin' you
I almost wish you woulda loved me too

Here I go thinkin' about all the things I could have done
I'm gonna need a forklift cuz all the baggage weighs a ton
I know we had our problems, I can't remember one.

I almost forgot to say something else
And if I can't fit it in
I'll keep it all to myself
I almost wrote a song about you today
But I tore it all up and then I threw it away

Friday, December 16

it could be so sad, knowing u dont find meaning in life anymore...

Im very sick and i dont like it one bit. I missed the last day of school today and it sucks. I love my classmates too much. =) I was suposed to go for the bird flu vaccination too, but I heard the vaccination is out of stock or something.

I spent most of today sleeping in, the medicine made me so drowsy i couldnt read much of my book. Theres tons of stuff to be done during the e-learning week and although it seems like im very free during the week, i have quite a few projects to do. -sighs.

I went out with joanne yesterday, we caught the movie "Perhaps love". I think its a good show. And we went to the mango sales which was totally horrible, it was packed with people and clothes were flying everywhere.

Its time for medicine again.

Tuesday, December 13

Zhu lost her ez link and atm cards today. Thats really bad, the photos we used to take are gone too. Hope some kind soul returns it to her school or something.

Why oh why,
im getting that feeling in me again.
How i wish i could stay forever, in the beautiful make-believe world.

Monday, December 12

Im back from a long day in school. & all 'cos my mob lecturer wanted a make-up lecture today from 5 to 6. And im gonna type this super-long entry.

I kinda got chided by my mom 3 mins after i reached home - for being disrespectful to my great grandma & my grandaunts (who, unfortunately, came my house yesterday). I couldnt say how much i hated them to come 'cos everytime they did, i cant remember the goodness of peacefulness. I would hear them shouting (to them - talking) even at the staircase, and i definitely couldnt block out their voices by closing my door. ITS HORRIBLE!! Both my sis and I hates them la, to the core.

So, I told my grandma that she would definitely fall sick with the noise they created yesterday & i kinda got chided by my mom. But i guess shes used to such remarks from me. Its kinda obvious since now, my sis and I dont even bother to greet them and I dont even look at their eyes. It just irks me like totally. ARGH! I wished my parents would cut it off with this disrespectful thingy, its a fact they are disturbing my life. Its so rude of them to come early in the morning on a weekend, while im still sleeping soundly and making hell lot of noises. What the fuck. Everytime my great grandma came over to stay, she brings noise pollution with her. Wahaha. And together, she & her daughters ~~talk~~ scream as loud as they can.

Even worse, I think my grandfather sucks, sometimes. Hes always shouting at my granny and making her do stuff. Yesterday, he and my 3 grandaunts played mahjong and made so much noise i felt like taping their mouths. Then, my dad bought green bean soup back and my grandma, although feeling sick & dizzy, had to serve all of them the soup. They could just sit there comfortably, and get something to eat. Like seriously, WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH THEM. Are they crippled or something? Do they really feel polite and comfortable doing all these shit?! I think the worst ounishment for them would be they go mute and cant walk. I cant imagine how peaceful would that be. Im not being mean or anything, but they are just fucking irritating.

Fuckfuckfuck. Now my grandma's sick.

But on a happier note, yongqi found her thumbdrive! =)

Sunday, December 11

Believe me when I say Im gonna be broke this time. Other than eating myself poor, I gotta get tons of x'mas presents for all of my darlings. I've got two gifts exchange la, and I have completely no idea what to buy for them. Then, I've got sweetie zhu, jo and va, and some other close friends.

And i just took a bite out of the wonka choco bar. It is deliciously delicious, I gotta watch out for my weight though. Totally wicked.

This.. is prolly one of the richest and most delicious chocolate you can get for a mere few bucks. (excuse those teeth marks though). &thats the cat that goes "wa wa".

Saturday, December 10

All I did today was eat ALOT ALOT ALOT. I feel so freaking full.
and i love candy empire!

Friday, December 9

It wasnt till yesterday I realised that somehow, I like to be alone. It was nice sitting at the library@orchard reading a good book. I could be so engrossed in a book, so much I dint want to leave when sweetie came to meet me for our somewhat regular shopping trip.

I think i seriously need a job, I've been wasting my time away. I gotta save up more for the year-end trip.

Let me fall into something really nice... ...

something called unconsciousness.

Saturday, December 3

OFFICIALLY DEPRESSED

Thursday, December 1

I am so TIRED. Spent 5 hours packing my room, and I feel a sense of satisfaction now that everythings neat and tidy.

While I was packing, I came across tons of photos and stuffs. And I seriously seriously miss those primary and secondary school days. I feel so sad those very happy days are over. I hate to admit this but, I really miss secondary school. It was funny looking at my 4e1 class photos. Wahaha.

Its not like im not loving my poly friends, I do love them much. They're nice people, but it just feels so different from secondary school. Life could be like so different. I miss classes with zhu, sitting with my sweet mates. Now, its like we prolly meet once a few months?

I saw in a photo, this big elephant soft toy I used to adore. Light green in colour and the fur so soft. Its like really cute. But my mommy threw it away, I got pretty upset then. I took a photo of all my toys! lmao. I have this easter bunny toy thats almost 8 years old. So cute (& dusty?). I browsed through a whole bag of letters, and I laughed so much reading those crap people wrote me. But nevertheless, still so sweet. Love them all loads.

Im thankful for everything that happens in my life. Heaven's been kind enough to me.

I feel so shagged every single day. I had yet another nightmare last night. As a result, im late for school again. Im sick of rushing through my baths, changing into whatever crappy clothes i can find and walking so fast my feet hurts.

My life's pretty screwed up at this moment and i dont know what to do bout it.